Updates

We had a wonderful Disney trip and it was such a great time to enjoy our family! Maybe if my more blog savvy friend helps me I will post some pictures! We will see! We still havn't heard anything about our adoption. I honestly was praying that while we were experiencing the Disney magic we would receive the call that a mom wanted to meet us. Not God's timing.

A very good friend has been praying for her future babies and now has given us names to attach to the prayers. What a great idea and it is an honor to pray for them by name. I am selfishly gonna steal her idea--not her names !!!
When we receive our sweet baby or babies their names will be Canaan William or Charis Lorraine. I'm asking that you pray with us too for our children by name. God wants us to pray with purpose so that is why I am going to be more specific. It is time that Satan is defeated and that these children whether by birth or adoption are brought into our lives so that we may praise His works from our generation to the next. Nate and I want to raise children who know God and have a personal relationship with Jesus. We are declaring this generation to be HIS!!! Let God be exalted and the enemy scattered!!!
Thanks for praying specifically with me for the birthmom to choose life and to choose us. Pray for Canaan or Charis or both, and pray for us that our home will be prepared and our hearts ready for one of the greatest gifts ever!

the big 5

My little baby is five years old!!!!! It is so hard to believe that 5 years ago today we brought Benjamin home after a 3 day extra stay in the NICU. I remember that day he was finally "ours" and we were completely responsible for him. It was incredible! Today, 5 years later, it is more than awesome. I am the most blessed mom in the world. I am proud of the young man he is becoming and I'm looking forward to getting away with my family over spring break. We thought we might have had our new baby by this point so we had made tentative arrangements for our vacation with a little one but it looks as though it will be the 3 of us. This may be the last family vacation the way we are now. That's something to think about. I have learned or maybe I am still learning that I should soak in the now and while it is good to look ahead to the future and plan and dream that I should not get so lost in the future that I miss how great the present is! It is priceless!
Please keep praying for our baby, the birthmother, that she will choose life for her baby and that she will choose us to raise this precious child. (Also pray that it happens very soon!!!)

It's a No

Doesn't sound too promising of a title does it? Well, I guess maybe it's not. I had wanted to be able to write that Shaohannah's Hope, the non-profit where we applied for an adoption grant, had granted us money. We received a letter of regret yesterday in the mail---disappointment---yes. While I know that God is our Provider and He alone knows what is best for us, this to me seemed like it would be what He would choose. Our hopes were high since we had made it to the second round, so to receive a no was a huge let down. Through this, as through much of the past 8 years, God has reminded me that His ways are not my ways. I love that and I hate that. My ways are the only "ways" I understand and get to control. I want my ways to line up more and more with His ways. When they don't it's not that I am disappointed in God -I'm disappointed in me. Maybe none of that makes sense. All I know is that God is God. If I were God I would have made a mess of things long ago, so I trust Him. It's my impatience and frustration and instant gratification personality that get in the way. Help me Lord, with that one. So, grant money will not come from that avenue but my Father has more riches than I can imagine. He is in control. He has chosen the right baby for our family and He will provide for that precious child and for us. I just can't wait until we get the "yes" after having so many years of "no". Pray with me for this baby, for its birth mom, and for Amazing Grace Adoptions as they minister, discern, and place children into forever homes.